CAPTIVE IN COVENTRY
Ozzie's Opera Binoculars
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- Oz Cashes In On Information, Not Things -
I was in Massachusetts just before the famous Phish concert of 2004. I was coming up
I-91 the Saturday of the weekend long concert and saw cars lined up in the right
hand lane for miles. I couldn't believe my eyes as as we live in a pretty unpopulated
area and I had never seen anything like it before.
I put my thinking cap on as I exited my Barton exit to head home. The Barton exit is
one south of the best exit to get off for the concert.
A long story but I had a whole case of small opera type binoculars that had belonged
to a dot.com business that went under as so many did back then. I figured that lots of
these concert goers could sure use them as it was clear this was going to be a gigantic
crowd, many standing far from the stage.
I fastened an oversized milk crate on the back of my dirt bike and headed south on 91.
The line of cars had grown and were not moving. I started at the last car, miles south of
the Barton exit and offered each driver a binocular for $20. After 20 cars of no sales I
began to get discouraged. The 21st car said no but asked if there was a quicker way to get
there. I said sure but it would cost him 20 bucks. No prob says he after I tell him how quickly
he'd get there.
He hands over the dough, I tell him to proceed to the next crossover and take it so you'll be
heading south. Take that down to the next exit, get off and get on Rte. 122 north. That ends
at Rte. 16. Take that north into Barton and pick up Rte. 5 north and you'll get close and you'll
save hours of waiting. Off he went with a huge smile.
The guy behind him says "Where the hell is he going?". I stall the guy so he can't just follow
the first guy and avoid my 20 bucks. Finally I give him the dirt as he hands over the sawbuck
($20). Off he goes and the next 15 cars do a repeat performance. The 16th is just about to hand
over the moolah when the announcement comes over her car radio, that the gates have been
closed due to the size of the crowd and no one else will be let in. Oh well says I, can't
complain about $300+ bucks.
My son-in-law went there the day after during the massive clean up and walked away with
all the camping tents and tarps he could carry.
Ozzie, many years later flying
his kite out over Cape Cod Bay